"Why she be actin' like that?
She get it from her mama."--Juvenile
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Y'all. Life can be a lot. People can be too much. Yet, we're here and need to learn to navigate or block out.
Observations over the years as a parent interacting with other parents and their children have revealed so much.
Rotten children often have rotten parents.
Insufferable children often have insufferable parents.
Children who lack accountability often have parents who lack accountability.
Etc.
It's really that simple sometimes. It also goes the other way.
The parents--and I'm talking about people 30 plus/approaching 40—have not grown into the maturity it takes to make and/or sustain meaningful relationships or to even be generally cordial. Although I hope this is not the case and that maturation will come to the parents, I suspect that their children will struggle in the same way.
Mothers are the first teachers, and whether the child is learning to clean, do hair, or dance like mom or they're learning to be bossy, rude, or perpetually blame others like mom, she or he is learning. We've got to get this right because they're watching, learning, and absorbing.
I've had to have discussions with my children following some social interactions we've witnessed or had to help them understand certain behaviors and attitudes, and as much as I want to just break down and tell it to them in a Southern vernacular consistent with my roots (e.g. "She act like that cause her mama ain't 'bout s*it. "), I do my best to make my explanations to them descriptive and comprehensible and not reflective of what I'm really thinking...and how I'm thinking it.
I should add that the descriptive language has nothing to do with their accolades, status, or achievements. This is about character.
With all that said, people we associate with regularly and even irregularly are usually really wonderful and pleasant to interact with. At 40+ with so much going on in life and with family, that's all I can tolerate.
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